i just photoshopped my ex out of my life.

we could call it symbolic for completely moving on or something but i did that already.really i just did this because eliza said i should and i wanted to prove that i could. 

before

after

cause i've seen it before and i don't care anymore

and a new blog design. i guess it's just me feeling more sure of the path i'm on + some frustration + a little leftover bitterness haha. or it's just pretty and funny.

edward cullen wishes he was this hot

i love lists

as requested by eliza.

a compilation of websites that i frequent and/or love and/or think people might enjoy. 

we heart it 
   We Heart It is a social bookmarking tool for images and videos. You create your own page and then when you are surfing the net you can save pictures that you like or that inspire you on your page so they are all in one place. You can see my page here. 

dooce

      This is a blog written by a woman living here in Salt Lake. She is very funny and she has great style. I love reading her stuff and looking at her photos. 

journal fodder junkies

       This is a blog about keeping a journal. I like it cause there are other people out there as obsessed about keeping a journal as i am. You can look at their art and there are also tutorials so you can learn cool stuff. 

cake wrecks

   Eliza actually showed me this one but i am still sharing it. It is pictures of professional cakes gone wrong. v. v. funny. 

threadless tees

    I love this website. I wish i could buy all the shirts. They are a community-based t-shirt company with an ongoing, open call for design submissions. In other words, average every-day artists design the graphics on the tees. I have considered doing something...

collapsingnight's livejounal

      I actually came across this woman's site through the twilight fandom (*guilty*)... she and i have a similar taste in art, music, and photography and i find a lot of great stuff through her. She makes icons for livejournal users and i don't livejournal but i love icons. cute little 1 by 1 inch square photos. she also makes kick butt playlists for every thing. 

utah photographic arts council

      I had to include this. I am a member and so i have a gallery of stuff on here and i know all the other fabulous artists! 

i can read

      Images with words. I love words. Therefore i love this site.

hayley williams of paramore

       ... is my hero. I want to be her. This website is all about her style and where she shops and how she does her make-up. Girl has style. I love this site even though it is a little stalker-y. haha.

overheard in new york

        So freaking funny. People in new york submit things they actually overhear on the streets and stuff. I read it and think there is no way people say things out loud like this... but they do. 

ze's page

      Random, fun, and funny stuff to help you waste time on the computer. I recommend the scribbler, break_up, and string spin. 

create a snowflake

      Another good time waster.

kurt halsey

      I love this guys work so much! 

new years resolutions

       People submitted not so normal new years resolutions. Its really simple art but i like it for the words. Kinda inspirational in a weird way. 

a softer world

This is a totally awesome comic strip. She takes the pictures and he writes the comic... i love it! It's funny and sad and harsh and fabulous. 

and then for checking out art there's always:

ffffound

deviantART

flicker 

oh and i love post secret... everyone knows what that is right?

this ended up being a longer list then i thought it would be...

happy valentines day from a 14 year old me

click here to laugh at rachel 8 years ago 

left leg not broken... but it should be

"Life these days is getting rough

Knocks you down and beats you up

But it’s just a roller coaster anyway, yeah

It’s not right, not okay

Say the word that should say

Maybe we’re better off this way

I’m not fine, I’m in pain

It’s harder everyday

Maybe we’re better off this way

It’s better that we break, baby"

 -Maroon 5

i've gotten a taste of what it is like to lose someone this week... really lose someone. gone. off the planet. i've lost people before (see above- broken friendship). but death is not something i have had to deal with yet. i have both my parents, all my siblings, all my friends, all four grandparents, my cousins and all of my aunts and uncles- save annalise, who's void i do feel in my life- but she died when i was a baby and so i cannot claim to have felt the pain of her actual death (besides, i like to think she watches over me and therefore i have had her all along). 

understandably the thought of losing someone so close to me has freaked me out pretty thoroughly and i am once again thinking that i'm in a hurry and there's just not enough time.  i'm thinking of mistakes i've made and broken friendships and other things going wrong in my life and i am, as usual, unsure of my next step. 

but this i do know.

my grandpa should be dead. but he is here. he is alive. 

and so am i. 

 

take this as a sign?

songs you might need durring the scary moments

1. Ross Copperman (They'll Never Know)

Hush, baby don’t cry. Just get through this night 

Overcome.

2. Robbie Seay Band (Shine Your Light On Us)

Let Your rescue come for us, we long to love 

And if you feel lost, sing along

3. Paramore (Miracle)

I've been waiting for a miracle 

And I'm not leaving

4. Ingrid Michaelson (Keep Breathing)

All i can do is keep breathing.  All we can do is keep breathing now. 

 All we can do is keep breathing 

5. City and Colour (Hello, I'm Delaware)

It's been so long. Sometimes I wonder how I will stay strong...

But I will see you again.

I got a scary phone call today.

The kind people pray they will never get. 

"Rachel, your grandpa is in intensive care." 

And all I could do and fathom and be was in that one sentence. Heart-ending and gut-pounding and soul-crushing as it was, the only thing I knew to do was twist my face into this shocked look that was scary enough to prompt an, "oh my gosh rachel, what happened?" from both my roommates. And I have never felt so helpless. It is hard for me to just pray. To offer up something like the prayer you say even though you know what you ask for might be pointless, but all you have left between you and that thing that scares you the most is a sliver of a hope that your prayer will save you.

yeah, maybe
amen

origami

click here for awesomeness...

so brilliant!

T, D & Z

a love a good adventure...
just messing around.
i love having new models!

bad dreams and morning breath: an experiment in podcasting

Karen: God. My hips are huge!
Gretchen: Oh please. I hate my calves.
Regina: At least you guys can wear halters. I've got man shoulders.
Cady: [voiceover] I used to think there was just fat and skinny. But apparently there's lots of things that can be wrong on your body.
Gretchen: My hairline is so weird.
Regina: My pores are huge.
Karen: My nail beds suck.
[pause. All look at Cady]
Cady: I have really bad breath in the morning.
Karen: Ew! 

-Mean Girls

podcast #1 : click to listen! 

senior pictures: annalise

just delirious

well aren't you just a cute little pyromaniac?

there really isn't much of an explanation for this. while in the process of packing and getting ready to move i came across this stack of letters i had written someone several months back. letters that i never intended to send. a therapeutic exercise of sorts. 

so why did i burn them? 

it felt appropriate i suppose 

i have always risen from my own ashes, like a phoenix, and this was just another one of those times. 

captured in photographs. 

Ashes... such a pretty word for such an ugly thing

© r.johanna arts 2009